Happy Valium Times Day from Honcho the Grouch

valium times day

valium times day

From the desk of Honcho the Grouch

It’s February 14th and Valium Times Day, whoops Valentines Day is upon us again. Some people think of flowers. Some people think of big fluffy hearts and love songs. I think of love songs too, but I prefer the songs of lost or unrequited love or even full-on heartbreak. It’s not that I don’t like a good love song, it’s just that most are super sappy and not believable.

Not everyone will find his or her “one true love.” But most everyone has had their heart snapped in half at one time or another. Mine has crumbled more than once and I’ve unfortunately caused a few hearts to be sent to the love ER. What I’ve compiled here are songs that remind me of those past…episodes. Man I love ’em.

When you are an insecure, punk teenager, Green Day’s “At the Library” really hits home. A song about a boy, watching a girl that he “adores,” at the library. He is trying to psych himself up to go talk to her and right when he feels like he can…. she gets up and leaves with her boyfriend. ARGH!! Hurts so good.

There is nothing quite like reveling in your sad, heartbroken loneliness and I have just the song to go with it. “Loneliness” by Ed Harcourt is by far one of my favorite songs of ALL TIME. It’s one of those that I can listen to an infinite number of times because I have been there. I know what he is saying and yes, sometimes feeling lonely is really nice. A girl once dumped me before the holidays, so on Christmas Eve I walked to her apartment. It was raining, I had my headphones on and listened to sad songs on the walk over. Of course she wasn’t home, why would she be? This isn’t an article about getting back together. But MAN, this song is so good. What was I talking about?

In 1999, The Magnetic Fields released the magnum opus, 69 Love Songs. That album could make up this entire list on its own… it’s just that good. I like to single out “Grand Canyon” when I am feeling melancholy, though. A song about what a person would do for his love if only he/she still loved them “that way”. It’s so short and perfect and good and… it really is perfect.

“Seven Rooms of Gloom” by The Four Tops is the most adult heartbreak song on this list. I really can’t say why; maybe the imagery of empty houses, broken love and all that crap just makes me a mess. I’ve been through a divorce and came out stronger for it. So, when I first heard this song, it really hit home. Not my favorite, but definitely hits me where it hurts. In some versions, by far the most danceable track of the bunch.

“I’m Gonna Stop Pretending That I Didn’t Break Your Heart” by the Eels. At some point I just had to own up to the fact that I had hurt some people through my careless and foolhardy ways. At the time I thought they would get over it quickly, but my fragile little heart didn’t heal as quickly as I wanted it too. So, why should someone else’s? I like to listen to this track to keep myself on a more even keel; really think about what my actions can do to those around me. I know  those that I have hurt won’t read this, but I would like to say that I am very sorry. I was a total ass.

“Ever Fallen In Love (With Someone You Shouldn’t Have)”? YES! Good lord, were the Buzzcocks reading my mind? Oh wait, they wrote this when I was like 3. Man, universal songs are the best! Seriously, the Buzzcocks are one of the most underrated punk bands of the 70’s. This song is a testament to their sharp songwriting. It hits just as strongly 30 plus years later. Who hasn’t had that horrible realization that all the love you invested was just flushed down the toilet? If you haven’t, I don’t want to talk to you. Ever.

“Miss Tara” is off of Johnny Cash’s children’s album. It’s not about a woman leaving him for another man, or anything like that. It’s about a dad seeing his daughter growing up and leaving home to become her own person. I have a daughter who is nearly 16 and started dating recently. So this song…..this song is the most personal to me right now. This song is real heartbreak.
[unfortunately this one was a bit too hard to find, but take my word for it… it’ll break your heart]

To show you that I am not (all) grouchy and mean, please take a moment to listen to Jawbreaker’s love song “Chesterfield King”. Guy blows it, leaves, gets some sage advice from a gnarly old lady in a 7-11 parking lot, drives too fast, pulls up to the girl’s house….

“You were waiting on your step, steam showing off your breath and water in your eyes. We pulled each other into one, parkas clinging on the lawn and kissed right there. Said all my chicks they smoke these things and handed you a Chesterfield King. Held your hand and watched TV and traced the little lines along your palm.”

Happy Valentines Day, you punks!

Comments

  1. oh MAN. i love that ed harcourt song (and, i think, every other ed harcourt song). i’ma listen to your playlist RIGHT NOW. good job, honcho!!

  2. Great picks! I love love 🙂

  3. love this. the magnetic fields are in my top 5 all time favorite bands. well, stephen merritt in all his forms…

  4. You sure know how to rock a broken heart. Thanks Honcho. Happy ValiumTimes Day.

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